Singer-composer Amaal Mallik just lately opened up a couple of deeply private chapter of his life, one which concerned heartbreak, and a troublesome alternative between love and self-respect.
Talking with Siddharth Kannan, the 33-year-old recalled his relationship that lasted from 2014 to 2019, and the way it got here to an finish when his companion’s household disapproved of his faith and his profession within the movie trade. “We have been in a relationship from 2014 to 2019. However her mother and father have been towards my faith and profession. They didn’t need to affiliate their daughter with anybody from this trade,” he stated.
The breakup, Amaal stated, occurred simply earlier than a efficiency, when he acquired a life-altering telephone name. “I used to be about to carry out a gig when she known as me and stated she is getting married, however she would elope if I got here to her. However, I assume the SRK from DDLJ in me wakened and stated, ‘No, in case your mother and father can’t settle for my faith and respect my profession, then I want you the most effective.’”
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After this went viral on-line, his father Daboo Malik responded with a shifting remark, “Son … keep in mind your father is at all times there… I do know your ache and I like you to eternity… There may be none such as you…”
Earlier this yr, Amaal made headlines after saying that he was clinically depressed and had determined to chop off private ties along with his household, together with his mother and father and brother, singer Armaan Malik, by way of a submit on Instagram.
So, how widespread is it for relationships to interrupt down attributable to non secular or cultural variations?
Sonal Khangarot, a licensed rehabilitation counsellor and psychotherapist, tells indianexpress.com, “As a psychologist, I see this generally: people deeply in love but emotionally torn when their bond clashes with familial or societal expectations. The strain to adapt can result in persistent stress, anxiousness, guilt, and even identification confusion. When love is seen as rise up, people might really feel compelled to decide on between their emotional reality and the approval of these they have been raised to respect.”
In lots of instances, she provides, the connection doesn’t survive — not attributable to lack of affection, however attributable to cultural roadblocks. The emotional toll is profound: grief, isolation, and unresolved anger. Navigating this requires compassion, readability, and sometimes, therapeutic help. In India, the place collectivist values dominate, the price of defying custom may be heavy, but denying private authenticity comes with its lasting psychological penalties.
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Significance of feeling ‘seen’ and validated in a companion’s household
Khangarot says, “I typically see how very important belongingness and interpersonal validation are to emotional well-being. In collectivist cultures like India, acceptance by a companion’s household isn’t simply symbolic — it affirms one’s price and strengthens relational safety. Selecting to not elope, as Amaal Mallik did, displays a want for relational legitimacy — being seen, revered, and built-in into the companion’s social world. Rejection from a companion’s household can set off emotions of inadequacy, disgrace, and attachment insecurity. Alternatively, familial approval gives a way of social anchoring, reinforcing the connection’s stability and the person’s identification inside a shared cultural framework.”
